Welcoming nominees and friends to the 76th DGA Awards, director, producer and author Judd Apatow greeted the viewers joking, “I’m your host Bradley Cooper in an much more beguiling Jewish nostril.”

Apatow opened up with a zinger drafting off the DGA’s historical past of by no means placing in opposition to the studios. He famous that his brokers advised him to carry out for more cash for his fifth time as host of the ceremony: “However within the spirit of the DGA I accepted their first provide.”

Taking purpose on the present political panorama, Apatow addressed the group stating, “I swear to god if that is the one time you vote this yr, you possibly can all go fuck yourselves.” He famous the age of the doubtless nominees for the presidential election, Joe Biden and Donald Trump. The race goes to be between “a man sufficiently old to have met Hitler and a man who needs he had.”

Dedicating the evening to the “legendary” Norman Lear, who not too long ago died at 101, Apatow swore to not relaxation till he “discovered his killer.”

The official grasp of ceremonies then turned his consideration to different award present hosts: “I’d prefer to thank Jo Koy for decreasing the bar for me. I’d prefer to thank the Administrators Guild who had the braveness to rent a white Jewish man to host this ceremony.”

Taking inventory of the previous yr within the leisure trade, Apatow mused about what the enterprise realized from the double-strike yr: “Fran Drescher is the voice of cause and sadly that’s what cause feels like.”

Apatow additionally touched on the merger fever that has gripped Hollywood amid laborious instances for legacy studios. “Right here’s the way it’s gonna occur. First, Warner Bros. Discovery will merge with Paramount and Comcast will merge with Sony. Apple will merge with Netflix after which take over Warner Paramount Discovery. Apple does a hostile takeover of Comcast Sony after which instantly engulfs Warner Paramount Discovery. Apple does a hostile takeover of Comcast Sony after which instantly engulfs Warner Paramount Discovery. Then Elon Musk takes his personal cash and executes a leveraged buyout of each of these firms. And, with the intention to streamline the operation, Musk fires everybody aside from 37 folks. Then Jeff Bezos jumps in and buys the entire thing as a Valentine’s present to his girlfriend, Lauren Sanchez. Then she will get uninterested in it and flips it to Salma Hayek. After which it’s a golden age of creativity and risk-taking and it’s just like the ’70s and all that. And that’s abruptly when Byron Allen comes up and buys the entire thing with money.”

Persevering with to roast the Globes, Apatow threw shade on the new classes added for the 2024 ceremony and provided up a number of strategies of his personal together with: “Finest film starring Timothée Chalamet in a hat. Finest Tom Cruise film based mostly on a earlier Tom Cruise film. One of the best Kevin Spacey film solely being launched in Northern Italy. One of the best Steven Soderbergh movie shot on a Ring doorbell.”

Final yr Apatow skewered “High Gun: Maverick” star Tom Cruise, calling the actor’s well-known acrobatic stunt work, “an advert for scientology.” As for this yr’s nominees, the most effective function movie director nods on the 76th annual DGA Awards included Greta Gerwig for “Barbie,” Christopher Nolan for “Oppenheimer,” Martin Scorsese for “Killers of the Flower Moon,” Yorgos Lanthimos for “Poor Issues” and Alexander Payne for “The Holdovers.”